The problem is rarely a lack of confidence. It’s a system with unwritten rules that still decide who reaches senior leadership. This guide explains what those rules are, according to research, and how to gain influence, visibility and sponsors within it.
Your results are solid, but promotions come more slowly than you expected; you have good mentors, but no one championing your name in the room where decisions are made; or you feel you have to choose between being firm and being well liked.
For years, the dominant message has been that women need to “believe in themselves more”. Research points elsewhere. Robin Ely, Herminia Ibarra and Deborah Kolb called it second-generation gender bias: not open discrimination, but seemingly neutral practices and patterns (how projects are assigned, which leadership style is associated with success, who belongs to informal networks) that, taken together, favour those who already fit the dominant model.
McKinsey and LeanIn’s Women in the Workplace 2025 report adds a revealing finding: for the first time, women are less interested in being promoted than men, but that gap disappears when women receive the same career support. Ambition isn’t the problem. Support is.
What happens: Herminia Ibarra and her colleagues found that high-potential women have as many mentors as men, or more, but fewer sponsors: people with power who use their influence to advocate for them. McKinsey’s 2025 report confirms that women still receive less sponsorship and less active advocacy from their managers.
What you can do: Distinguish who advises you from who decides. Identify the two or three people who influence your next promotion and make sure they know your ambition and have seen your work first-hand.
What happens: Catalyst’s research describes a familiar dilemma: when a woman acts assertively she is seen as competent but less likeable; when she is warm, she is seen as likeable but less competent. Men rarely have to manage that tension.
What you can do: It isn’t about choosing one side, but about widening your influence repertoire: combining firmness and warmth deliberately, framing your proposals in terms of the other person’s goals and choosing your battles with judgment.
What happens: Linda Babcock and her colleagues showed that women are asked, and agree, more often to take on necessary tasks that count little for promotion: organising, coordinating, training or filling gaps. They take time and are rarely recognised.
What you can do: Review where your time goes and how much of it brings you closer to senior leadership. Learn to say no, or to negotiate something in return, without damaging your reputation.
What happens: Many women leaders trust their work to speak for them. At senior levels, however, decisions are made on reputation, and reputation is built in informal networks where access isn’t always equal.
What you can do: Work on your strategic visibility: make known not only what you’ve achieved, but how you think. A clear personal brand and a deliberate network aren’t vanity; they’re part of the job.
A mentor advises you and helps you grow. A sponsor uses their power and influence to advocate for you in the decisions that matter. Research shows women tend to have mentors but fewer sponsors, and it is sponsorship that is most associated with promotion.
It is a subtle and usually unintentional bias: seemingly neutral practices and patterns, such as project allocation or the leadership model considered successful, that together favour those who already fit the dominant profile. The concept was developed by Robin Ely, Herminia Ibarra and Deborah Kolb.
It is the dilemma described by Catalyst: when a woman leads assertively she is seen as competent but less likeable; when she is warm, as likeable but less competent. Managing it means widening your influence repertoire, not choosing one of the extremes.
Research suggests the main factor isn’t confidence but support: according to McKinsey and LeanIn, the gap in interest in promotion between women and men disappears when women receive the same career support.
I work with women leaders in multinational companies to gain influence, visibility and sponsors on their way to senior leadership, with an approach grounded in research and in their own leadership style.